Wednesday, January 9, 2008

At first...there was nothing. Then there was my blog

So shall this blog rise from humble beginnings.

This is my first post on a blog ever. In a typical comic book storyline, this is what you might call the "origin" story. For example, Batman's origin story was that his Mom and Pop were gunned down and he was convulsed with bitterness, wanted revenge blah blah.... Superman was sent flying from his home world to earth in a spacepod by his dad. You must get what I mean.

A seemingly lame origin story that makes a lot of sense now....sort of.

But let me tell you the truth about origin stories: when the origin story is first thought up, it is usually a very crappy yarn. Full of loopholes, illogical conclusions, melodrama and inconsistencies. Its only when the story starts getting popular that the writers revisit the origin tale, clean up the mess they started with and sort of do a re-write of history. Then riding on a crest of existing popularity, the re-write is naturally always well received by the readers and wins acclaim.

Readers then go "wow, that was a damn good origin story man. Explains so much of the character's motivations and personality yada yada...". Little do they know it was reverse engineering.

So as you can see, impressing fanboys isn't the most difficult thing to do.

Friends have been bugging me for years to start blogging because they think I write funny. But I never really had the time nor the motivation. But something happened to me recently that gave me this motivation, and I can tell you, it makes a REALLY GOOD origin story.

If this blog ever gets popular, let me assure you that I will craft an origin tale to blow away the collective spandex underpants off Superman, Bats and all other scantily clad super heroines. So, watch this space if you like naked comic book heroes. For now, my origin story is that my friend finally persuaded me to write because I have enough free time on my hands. So there.

There are 2 things left to explain in today's first post. First my nick, and then the name of the blog.

The nick is Chiron, pronounced Kye-ron. Not Chee-ron as it has been oft pronounced, which is very much more vulgar sounding (locals would know what I mean).

Chiron is a character in greek mythology and he was a Centaur - meaning half man, half horse. That meant his upper torso and above is man, and body and legs were horse - this should be obvious since it would be strange in any other configuration.

Anyway the big deal with Chiron was that he was a philosopher, a teacher and a warrior. He had many good students including Ulysses, Jason of the Argonauts and some other fellas. When Chiron passed away, Apollo - God of the Sun, Archery and the Greek guitar - burned his image into the stars for all eternity and you have the constellation of the Sagittarius.

The constellation of the Sagittarius - I'm serious, that's what the photo says.

In my younger and more vacuous days, I kinda likened myself to having Chiron's benign temperament, his love of poetry, philosophy, war craft and his balance of cross-functional abilities. Plus I was really good on a motorcycle and I had a really fierce bike. When we rode, my bike and I were as one entity. Thus you have modern centaur Chiron.

As for the blog's name, I had a moment of revelation in one of my more languid, lazy, philosophizing afternoons as a student many years ago! My mind's machinations (or did I read it from somewhere, i really can't remember) led me to an undisputed universal truth! I found that one could practically categorise everybody into two types of people. I called the first type "Creatures of Thought" and the second type "Creatures of Experience". This is how I differentiated the two:

(i) Creatures of Thought are first and foremost thinkers(obviously), they approach life in a manner of processing, dissecting and progressing in a functionally fluid manner. They make decisions through clear rational means, measuring utility against utility. Such people tend to be accountants, auditors, IT people, civil servants, dentists, engineers, robots and other inanimate but highly effective people. I respect Creatures of Thought.

Very likely a Creature of Thought. You can tell from the suave debonair.

(ii) Creatures of Experience are very different. They consciously or unconsciously - mostly unconsciously - live to accumulate life's experiences. They move around, attracted by an unfamiliar experience, dive in and sate their curiosity. Often the experience is enjoyable and benign, but almost just as often, they can be bludgeoned, maimed or massacred. But in all cases, there is something gleaned from that occurrence, usually an emotional experience. You can identify a creature of experience but his consummate attraction to new things, events, situations, products, people....the wanderlust is evident, and consumes the creature's mind.

What a Creature of Experience typically looks like. Yes, we are outstanding in bed too.

These cravings don't stop. If the our creature survives a bad experience, he or she merely recovers and uncontrollably moves on to accumulate another vital experience. And so life goes on.

I have obviously classified myself as such a creature. And today I write a blog for everyone who considers themselves as such. But this blog is also for everyone else who's come for laughs at the expense of these hopeless and forlorn animals. My blog aims to please everyone!

I'll give you some good stories soon. Till my next post.